Thursday, February 4, 2010

Awesome Awesome Awesome. Crap Damn Crap.

I can't remember a night of such wildly extreme emotional swings in my life. On the one hand, you have the Caps coming out of nowhere to beat the Rangers 6-5 at MSG. Just an Awesome Awesome Awesome game. For 40 minutes I thought the streak was toast as the never-ending penalty parade picked up where it left off in November, allowing the offensively woeful Rags to score 5 goals. FIVE! What a terrible way to lose the streak; like losing your hot girlfriend to the kid with downs. That should never happen.

Then, THIS:

I feel like I betrayed you, Red Jesus, for ever doubting that you would skate through a world class defender and one-hand a goal over one of the best goalies in the world at a time when your team needed it the most. What an idiot I am.

Naturally, two goals and victory followed. YES! 12 WINS IN A ROW. WE'RE THE BEST TEAM IN THE NHL.

On the other hand, you have possibly the worst Caps-related news since the invention of the Pittsburgh Penguins. The Caps' Eastern Conference kryptonite, the yin to their yang, the bore-you-to-death with D, playoff-tested, Stanley Cup approved Brodeur-led New Jersey Devils just added the one thing the Caps could least afford them to: the best pure goal scorer in the world not named Alex Ovechkin. NOOO.

If you haven't heard, that's Ilya Kovalchuk. Devils GM Lou Lamoriello absolutely McPhee'd (NHL slang term meaning "dominated in a trade") the NHL's version of Vinny Cerrato, Thrashers GM Don Waddell. New Jersey gave up a middling rookie (Bergfors), a defenseman who didn't fit (Oduya), one four-star prospect (Cormier, suspended for rest of season) and a late 1st round pick. I'm not convinced just dumping these assets and NOT getting Kovalchuk back wouldn't have made the Devils better anyways. That's barely an exaggeration.

Ovechkin - 15 goals/season - awesomeness + SuperDweeb = Kovalchuk

In sum, the Caps' scariest Eastern foe just strengthened its weakness like twenty-fold. Its strength remains a strength: the Devils have allowed the fewest goals in the NHL, and they only lose two replaceable roster players. See they play this system where the center forechecks and forces the opposing D to pick a si-ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

My hope is Kovalchuk in Jersey ends up being a square peg in the round hole type situation, like Jagr on the Caps. Can such an offensively-oriented winger survive in such a defensively-oriented system like Jersey's?

My other hope is that it doesn't matter. The Caps are so hot right now. I can't even imagine a team in the history of time that could beat the Caps; maybe a team of 25 Ovechkins. Maybe. It'd be close. I hate you New Jersey.

[Image via RotoRob]


  1. Now all we need is to acquire Eric Staal and we've got our NJD kryptonite.

  2. If they would accept Erskine, Perrault, Cody Eakin/Della Rovere and our 1st, that would be the equivalent of what just happened.

  3. Good stuff. Agreed on almost everything except re: Bergfors. He's only 22 years old and has some pretty good upside.

  4. Just look at his name. Bergfors. Just sounds like a Thrasher. What a loser.

  5. I dunno, in the NHL 10 season I just finished Oduya won the Norris. BIG mistake Jerz!

  6. Of course, if Kovalchuk comes back to haunt the Caps, they have nobody to blame but themselves for not signing Johnny Oduya after drafting him in 2001. Then, he wouldn't have been dealt to Atlanta. EVERYTHING WOULD HAVE BEEN DIFFERENT. WE HAVE TO GO BACK.


  7. Let's just drop a hydrogen bomb in the magno-vortex and create a parallel dimension, in which the Caps haunt the Penguins for eternity and Kovalchuk sucks at hockey.


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