Friday, June 5, 2009

Friday Furburgers: My "Interaction" With Stan Kasten

So I'm at the Nat's game.

Fourth inning.

It's raining, but no worry. Suites have their benefits.

I grab another beer and walk toward the deck with my buddy.

I see Stan Kasten as I walk by.

My friend is introduced, and Kasten shakes his hand. "Nice to meet you," he says.

Then I stick my hand out and introduce myself.

What happens next? Here are the choices:

a) Kasten shakes my hand.

b) Kasten undoes his belt, drops his pants, squats, and takes a dump on my brand new kicks.

c) I say "Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Kasten," and stand there with my hand out for about 10 seconds as he looks away and refuses to acknowledge my existence, far too busy pondering whether he should put relish or sauerkraut, or, screw it, both, on his hot dog next inning, or how he can somehow get more fans in the stands by trading Ryan Zimmerman and Aaron Crow for the rights to this year's #1 pick, even though the Nat's already have the #1 pick and were unable to sign Crow after the draft last year.

Well, the answer is some combination of b and c, if you replace the word "kicks" in b to "ego" or "chest", and the word "Kasten" in c to "Dickhead". Kidding. He actually seemed like a nice guy, and I'm sure it was an honest mistake.

But hot damn, that was embarrassing. For me.

You cut me deep, Stan.

Anyway, without further ado I present your Friday Furburgers:

Caps '08-'09 rookie evaluations.
Hockey's Future

Flirting with other quarterbacks a dumb move by Danny and Vinny. Gee, ya think?
Sporting News

NHL Organizational Rankings has caps at 6. Sounds about right.
Hockey's Future

Redskins the 24th best (9th worst) all-around franchise in the NFL. Ugh.
Fox Sports

Clinton Portis the 6th best RB, according to Madden rankings. Chris Cooley the 4th best TE.

Speaking of Madden rankings, DeAngelo Hall is upset.
Redskins Blog

Speaking of DeAngelo Hall, DeAngelo Hall is still upset.
Redskins Blog

Charges dropped against Jeremy Bridges. There were charges against Jeremy Bridges?

Nationals Park given an A- by ballpark traveler. Whoopeeeee!
Thirty Ballparks

Great site for t-shirts. I can't decide between Gordon Bombay's Hawks retro and Jesse Hall's classic Ducks jersey. All input welcome.
My Party Shirt

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