I Told You So

You know the mark of a true baseball savant? Predicting the Cy Young Award winners in the preseason. Picking the Rockies to win the NL pennant was just my risk-taking side creeping out. You hear that ladies, I'm a risk taker.

Anyway our preseason predictions were nothing special, save for one special line from yours truly:

Cy Young Picks

Rico Fantastic - Felix Hernandez, SEA (AL); Clayton Kershaw, LAD (NL)
Red Rover - Brett Anderson, OAK (AL); Tim Lincecum, SF (NL)
Marion's Crackpipe - Felix Hernandez, SEA (AL); Roy Halladay, PHI (NL)
Iafrate's Baldspot - Jon Lester, BOS (AL); Roy Halladay, PHI (NL)

Victory is mine!

(Image courtesy of blog.seattletimes.nwsource.com)

Unofficial Capitals Awards Odds

Tonight in Vegas, Mike Green and Alex Ovechkin have a chance to make history. According to a tweet by PR guru Nate Ewell last night, not since Wayne Gretzky and Paul Coffey have two teammates repeated as NHL first team all-stars. Ovechkin is a lock and, no disrespect to Drew Doughty and Duncan Keith, Green should be too.

Odds of this happening, determined by yours truly without consulting official odds-makers in Vegas, using a calculator, or putting down the bottle:

4 to 5

Two-time reigning MVP Alex Ovechkin is nominated again for the Hart Memorial Trophy, which is voted on by the media. His competition is Henrik Sedin, who led the league in points, and Sidney Crosby, who tied for the league lead in goals with 51. While Ovechkin was bested in points by Sedin and equaled by Crosby, he dominated in points per game with a whopping (and career best) 1.51. Some are convinced that two absences due to suspension, a flameout in the Olympics, and the star-studded Caps lineup will hurt is chances to take home the trophy. Fair or unfair, I am one of those people, and I think Sedin ultimately takes home the Hart (althought I hope I'm wrong).


Odds of Ovechkin winning the Hart Trophy, determined by yours truly without consulting official odds-makers in Vegas, using a calculator, or putting down the bottle:

3 to 2

The Ted Lindsay Award, formerly known as the Lester B. Pearson Award, is given to the league's most outstanding player, as voted on by the NHL Player's Association. Ovechkin has won this award two years in a row and there is no reason it should end this year. While media members may fault Ovechkin for "dirty" play, players surely realize that there isn't a more dominating presence on the ice. I am fairly confident he will take home this trophy for the third year in a row.


Odds of Ovechkin winning the Ted Lindsay Award, determined by yours truly without consulting official odds-makers in Vegas, using a calculator, or putting down the bottle:

1 to 2

Now on to the difficult stuff and, as usual, it's Mike Green in question. The James Norris Memorial Trophy is awarded by the media to the NHL's top defense player who demonstrates throughout the season the greatest all-around ability at the position. While there are many tight races to be won tonight, this one will be subject to the most scrutiny. It's easy to determine a defenseman's offensive contributions through goals, assists, and points, but to quantify his defensive abilities is a much more daunting tasks. Advanced metrics such as GAON/60 and +-ON/60 help paint the picture but not every voter trusts them, let alone knows about them. Two things can sway these voters: their eyes and what everyone else is saying. Their eyes should tell them that Mike Green is the most dominant offensive defenseman in the game, and the stats back it up (76 points in 71 games to lead all defenseman). However, their eyes are also telling them that Green is prone to bad turnovers, that he gambles too much in the defensive zone, that he is cashing in on a number of easy assists to superstars like Ovechkin, Alex Semin, and Nicklas Backstrom. Making matters worse, there is a stigma surrounding Green, mostly undeserved, that he can't play defense because he's so good at offense. Just blame ignorant Flyers fans for that one. He's not freakin' Sandis Ozolinsh, people.


Nevertheless, Duncan Keith's consistency throughout the season as the steady rock of the Chicago defense will win him his first Norris Trophy. Drew Doughty will finish a close second, and Green a close third. I don't see Green ever winning a Norris if he fails to do so this year, especially as a young stud like Doughty matures into a better Chris Pronger, minus the douchiness.

I will be stunned if Green wins this award.

Odds of Mike Green winning the Norris Trophy, determined by yours truly without consulting official odds-makers in Vegas, using a calculator, or putting down the bottle:

3 to 1

The festivities begin tonight at 7:30 ET. The boozy pregame begins whenever you goddamn feel like it.
 

Caps Win the Presidents' Trophy!

I want to have the news first, and the Sharks just lost in OT to the Avalanche, meaning the Caps have clinched/won the President's Trophy with 114 points and 4 games to play (note the sweet little star). The Sharks sit at 107 points, with 3 games left, meaning the highest point total they can reach is 113. The Blackhawks have 105 points and 4 games left, so also can only reach 113 points.

Not quite the Stanley Cup

With the Caps 'sputtering' through these last few games, my excitement is mooted, but we should still be proud of being the best team in this regular season and happy that we will enjoy home ice advantage throughout the playoffs, particularly on a night when the Wizards just played in the toilet bowl and the Skins were back to their old 'tricks' (or something like that). Let's just hope we also get the trophy for being the best team in the playoffs.

(Image courtesy of hhof.com)

Raiders Leap-Frog Redskins in Worst Franchise Race

GOOD NEWS ALERT!! The Redskins achieved victory this weekend by not playing, and through the release of some damning news about their main rival. If you think I'm referring to the Cowboys here, you must have just awoken from a 20 year coma. In which case welcome to the Internet! Also, Buffalo wings are now a national thing, China is our main international rival, Taco Bell makes a black-shelled taco, and you can say "shit" on national TV. There, now you're caught up.

Except with respect to the Redskins, whose most glorious battle these days is being fought in the public eye instead of on the gridiron, against the Raiders instead of the Cowboys, and for the title of "most embarrassing professional sports organization" instead of the Super Bowl. Well this weekend, (un?)fortunately, the Raiders managed to leap-frog the Burgundy and Gold with release of the news that their head coach, Tom Cable, is a wife-beater. This on the heels of reports that Cable broke an assistant coach's jaw this summer. Rad!

Now let's be clear: Cable can't be the first head coach to have problems with the ol' ultraviolence at home. And players are not immune to this either (see Marshall, Brandon). But Tom Cable's spousal abuse has been documented FOR OVER TWENTY YEARS. How lazy, dumb, and/or willfully blind do you have to be to hire a scumbag like this? You think you're gonna change the culture of losing by having impressionable young football players follow Ike Turner's example?

The most telling part of the Raiders' incompetence in this oversight is that Cable physically abused a woman as recently as THE MONTH HE WAS HIRED: January 2009. I mean, it's one thing to excuse events long past. It's quite another to fail in basic due diligence, you know, maybe asking a recent girlfriend "hey, so what's Tommy Boy like after he's quaffed a few?" Call me crazy, but if you're going to put your $100 million+ on-the-field investment in the hands of a guy, you'd hope those hands would be good for character molding and not punching women in the face. The alternative explanation, that the Raiders knew all along and simply didn't care, is far more damning.

The Redskins might operate like the Third Reich with their dissent-banning and pathological denials; their marketing department may have received degrees from the Somalian School of Piracy; their owner may derive sustenance from baby seal blood and be as ruinously meddlesome as Mr. Nosferatu Al Davis; but at least they don't hire wife beaters. So, good job Redskins. That's one humongous comparative NOT FAIL we can now stack against the thousands of other FAILS in this race towards epic humiliation. You were in the lead for a while there.

Your move, Snyder.

2009-2010 NHL Predictions

When the puck drops in Boston in less than 24 hours, the Caps 8-month quest for Lord Stanley officially commences. I think I speak for all of us depressed Skins-Nats-O's-Wizards fans when I say, "It's about goddamn time."

Before we preview the Caps specifically, we decided to take a look at the entire NHL and offer our bold - as well as not very bold - predictions for the upcoming season. For the sake of simplicity, we each voted for our top five players on five major awards as well as division and conference winners. And, of course, your Stanley Cup Champion. Here's how it all went down:

Division Winners:

Consensus:

Southeast: Washington
Northeast: Boston
Atlantic: Pittsburgh
Central: Detroit
Northwest: Vancouver
Pacific: San Jose

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - Washington, Boston, Pittsburgh, Chicago, Calgary, San Jose
Red Rover - Washington, Boston, Philadelphia, Detroit, Vancouver, San Jose
Marion's Crackpipe - Washington, Boston, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Vancouver, San Jose
Iafrate's Baldspot - Washington, Boston, Pittsburgh, Chicago, Vancouver, San Jose

Analysis:

As one would pretty much expect, Washington, Boston, and San Jose are voted division winners in unanimous fashion. Philadelphia and Calgary steal a vote a piece, with the additions of big names like Pronger, Heatley, and Bouwmeester perhaps giving them the edge over the incumbents. The most interesting race, though, appears to be in the Central Division. Can the young Blackhawks succeed with high expectations or are they in for a major letdown, paving the way for Detroit to win their 321st (or something like that) consecutive division title?

Stanley Cup Champions:

Consensus:

Winner: Washington over Chicago

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - San Jose over Washington
Red Rover - Washington over Vancouver
Marion's Crackpipe - Washington over Chicago
Iafrate's Baldspot - Washington over Chicago

Analysis:

Is this finally the year? I sure hope so, but there's a lot that can happen between now and June. So far be it from me to be only one to pick against the Caps, but I just assumed it would be the kiss of death. You hear that, guys? This better not be the kiss of death. Anything short of a Cup and I'm blaming you. Crap.

Maurice "Rocket" Richard (Goal Scoring):

Consensus:

1. Alex Ovechkin, Washington
2. Dany Heatley, San Jose
3. Jarome Iginla, Calgary
4. Ilya Kovalchuk, Atlanta
5. (Tie) Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh; Evgeni Malkin, Pittsburgh; Zach Parise, New Jersey

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Crosby, 3. Kovalchuk, 4. Iginla, 5. Eric Staal
Red Rover - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Heatley, 3. Iginla, 4. Phil Kessel, 5. Alex Semin
Marion's Crackpipe - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Parise, 3. Jeff Carter, 4. Kovalchuk, 5. Semin
Iafrate's Baldspot - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Malkin, 3. Heatley, 4. Rick Nash, 5. Iginla

Analysis:

Come on...who else? He's won the trophy two years running and the guy who feeds him the puck, Nicklas Backstrom, is only getting better. Heatley's got a shot (no pun intended) to get to 50 playing next to Joe Thornton, but Ovechkin is the only player with a shot to get to 60. Or 70. Or 80. Should I...should I stop?

Art Ross (Points):

Consensus:

1. Alex Ovechkin, Washington
2. Evgeni Malkin, Pittsburgh
3. Joe Thornton, San Jose
4. Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh
5. Ryan Getzlaf, Anaheim

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - 1. Crosby, 2. Ovechkin, 3. Malkin, 4. Getzlaf, 5. Thornton
Red Rover - 1. Thornton, 2. Ovechkin, 3. Malkin, 4. Vincent Lecavalier, 5. Nicklas Backstrom
Marion's Crackpipe - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Malkin, 3. Crosby, 4. Getzlaf, 5. Semin
Iafrate's Baldspot - 1. Malkin, 2. Ovechkin, 3. Thornton, 4. Pavel Datsyuk, 5. Getzlaf

Analysis:

This vote was a lot closer than the Richard but the result was the same, with Ovechkin barely beating out Malkin for the top billing. The DCLS believes the addition of Mike Knuble on the top line may lead to more "assists" for Ovie (read: rebound goals), catapulting him just ahead of Malkin in this year's race. Crazy? No, logical.

Hart (Most Valuable Player):

Consensus:

1. Alex Ovechkin, Washington
2. Evgeni Malkin, Pittsburgh
3. Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh
4. Mike Richards, Philadelphia
5. Pavel Datsyuk, Detroit

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Crosby, 3. Getzlaf, 4. Malkin, 5. Martin Brodeur
Red Rover - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Richards, 3. Thornton, 4. Datsyuk, 5. Iginla
Marion's Crackpipe - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Malkin, 3. Datsyuk, 4. Getzlaf, 5. Toews
Iafrate's Baldspot - 1. Ovechkin, 2. Malkin, 3. Crosby, 4. Richards, 5. Iginla

Analysis:

As was the case with the Richard voting, we unanimously voted for Ovechkin to win the Hart for the third consecutive year. Are you bored with these selections? Too bad - what else did you expect from a homer blog? Keep an eye on Mike Richards, though. If Philadelphia overachieves, their captain - and one of the more underrated players in all of hockey - might get his long overdue recognition.

Norris (Best Defenseman):

Consensus:

1. Zdeno Chara, Boston
2. Mike Green, Washington
3. Nicklas Lidstrom, Detroit
4. Sergei Gonchar, Pittsburgh
5. (Tie) Jay Bouwmeester, Calgary; Shea Weber, Nashville

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - 1. Chara, 2. Lidstrom, 3. Chris Pronger, 4. Dan Boyle, 5. Green
Red Rover - 1. Gonchar, 2. Green, 3. Bouwmeester, 4. Lidstrom, 5. Weber
Marion's Crackpipe - 1. Green, 2. Chara, 3. Lidstron, 4. Dion Phaneuf, 5. Duncan Keith
Iafrate's Baldspot - 1. Chara, 2. Green, 3. Weber, 4. Lidstrom, 5. Bouwmeester

Analysis:

Not so surprisingly, this was by far the most difficult award to vote for. It usually is at season's end, too, and will likely continue to be until they split the award into two pieces: The Rod Langway Award for defensive defensemen, and the Bobby Orr award for offensive defensemen. Alas, this is not the case, and Chara will likely take the Norris home for the second consecutive year. Unless people miraculously stop smoking crystal meth and come to the realization that Mike Green is pretty damn good at defense, too.

Vezina (Best Goaltender):

Consensus:

1. Roberto Luongo, Vancouver
2. Steve Mason, Columbus
3. Martin Brodeur, New Jersey
4. Evgeni Nabokov, San Jose
5. Tim Thomas, Boston

Breakdown:

Rico Fantastic - 1. Brodeur, 2. Nabokov, 3. Miikka Kiprusoff, 4. Luongo, 5. Henrik Lundqvist
Red Rover - 1. Luongo, 2. Tomas Vokoun, 3. Jonas Hiller, 4. Brodeur, 5. Nabokov
Marion's Crackpipe - 1. Luongo, 2. Mason, 3. Niklas Backstrom, 4. Thomas, 5. Lundqvist
Iafrate's Baldspot - 1. Mason, 2. Luongo, 3. Thomas, 4. Cam Ward, 5. Semyon Varlamov

Analysis:

It appears time for perhaps the best goaltender on the planet, Roberto Luongo, to get his due. He's never won the Vezina, despite having the credentials year in and year out. We're betting that this is the year he gets it done. Also, note the top three in our consensus: Team Canada has an embarrassment of riches in their crease. I mean seriously...who do you start?

***

So there you have it. Any glaring omissions? You think we're a little too close to Ovechkin's "region"? Did we completely jinx the Caps? Any supplementary thoughts on the upcoming season? Please join us in the comments section...nothing like talking good hockey. Nothing.

Midseason DCLS Beltway Awards

It's the All-Star Break, and we at the DCLS would like to hand out the appropriate awards to our beloved miserable baseball teams. Categories considered but ultimately excluded were "Best Team", "Worst Team", and "Top Reason You May Not Want to Kill Yourself". Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2009 Midseason Beltway Awards!

Most Valuable Player: Luke Scott, Orioles

In only 66 games, Scott is sitting at .305/.384/.592 with 18 HR and 51 RBI. He ranks in the top 15 in the AL in slugging percentage (3rd), OPS (4th), and HR (15th). He has been the Orioles most consistent and dominant hitter since he came off the DL in late May. If for no other reason, he deserves this accolade because he is a notoriously streaky hitter who has yet to completely cool off. Until I just jinxed him.

-Honorable Mention: Adam Jones, Orioles; Adam Dunn, Nationals; Brad Bergesen, Orioles

Least Valuable Player: Daniel Cabrera, Nationals

0-5. 5.85 ERA. 16 K. 35 BB. 2.08 WHIP. $2.6 million. General lack of soul. Conned both area baseball teams into believing he was anything more than an awful basketball player stuck in an awful baseball player's awful team's uniform. Follow? Doesn't matter, he's our hands down loser.

-Honorable Mention: Mark Eaton, Orioles; Joel Hanrahan, Nationals

Best Hunting Beard: Joe Beimel, Nationals

Two words: Awesome.

More on that here.

-Dishonorable Mention: Sidney Crosby, Penguins


Best (Almost) Record-Breaking Performance: Ryan Zimmerman, Nationals

His 30-game streak was only the 7th such streak of the past decade, so we applaud his effort to enter baseball lore.

-Honorable Mention: Orioles beat Red Sox, June 30


Best Single Game Performance: Luke Scott, Orioles, July 7

Just a double away from the cycle and with 7 RBI to boot, Scott's performance about a week ago goes down as the Beltway's best of the season.

-Honorable Mention: Brad Bergesen, Orioles, June 9 and July 1; John Lannan, June 6


Unsung Hero: Josh Willingham, Nationals

If only because that photo just has to be included here. No, but seriously, dude's hitting .304/.419/.576. That's a .995 OPS in case you can't add, good enough for 5th in the NL were he to qualify.

-Honorable Mention: George Sherrill, Orioles

Guy Who Needs to Produce in the Second Half: Brian Roberts, Orioles

Any way you choose to look at it, the guy has had an awful year. Perhaps our expectations are unfair of the O's unquestioned team leader and catalyst, but that's what happens when you sign a brand new contract worth over $10 million a year. Do better, Brian, because the lineup ain't as potent without ya.

-Honorable Mention: Matt Wieters, Orioles; The Entire Nationals Bullpen, Nationals

Most Overpaid Player: Dmitri Young, Nationals Potomac Nationals

$5 million for a 35 year old with no place in the future of the franchise to play zero games. That's a bad dollar to game ratio, if you ask me.

-Honorable Mention: Melvin Mora, Orioles; Daniel Cabrera, Nationals


Breakthrough Performance: Nolan Reimold, Orioles

Although he's cooled down of late, Reimold has himself a comfortable position in AL Rookie of the Year talk. Yes, the AL Rookie class is somewhat lacking in production relative to hype, but Reimold is putting up above average power numbers and looks to be that 3rd outfielder of the future.

-Honorable Mention: Brad Bergesen, Orioles; Jordan Zimmerman, Nationals

Manager of the Year: Dave Trembley, Orioles



Because it's funny.




Honorable Mention: Manny Acta, Nationals


Because it's funny-er.

Rejoice, Washington! Your MVP Chants Are Safe For Another Season

Two-time Hart Trophy winner Alex Ovechkin. Sure has a nice ring to it, eh? Sure sounds a lot better than Chaka Khan. Who the hell thought that was a good idea?

The Russian Machine took home the NHL regular season's most coveted piece of hardware last night, edging out destroying Pittsburgh's Evgeni Malkin and Detroit's Pavel Datsyuk to become hockey's first back-to-back MVP since Dominik Hasek in 1997-98. No. 8 earned 115 of 133 first place votes. The last time a forward won multiple, consecutive MVP awards? Guy by the name of Gretzky had a nice run of eight straight back in the 80s.

Ovechkin is the first D.C. athlete ever to win consecutive MVP awards in any of the four major sports.

[Reuters, via Capitals Insider]

"I like playing in Canadian cities," Ovechkin said during his acceptance speech. "But right now, my favorite city to play in is Washington." You hear that, Calgary? Your tears only make him stronger.

Ovechkin also took home the Rocket Richard trophy as the league's goal scoring champion, and the Lester B. Pearson Award -- named for Toronto's magnificent airport, of course -- awarded to the league's best player as judged by their on-ice peers. Three trophies in one night? Not a bad haul, though Ovechkin would surely trade all of them for a different, larger trophy.

Things didn't go quite as well for Mike Green, who still looks fucking ridiculous with that droopy mohawk of his. Despite scoring a ridiculous 31 goals as a defenseman and making a pretty compelling case that he could have been an MVP candidate himself, No. 52 came in second to Boston's Zdeno Chara. Though reports on Twitter indicate that the outcome is being disputed, and that the disenfranchised are storming the streets in protest. Or perhaps my Twitter feeds are mixed up. Actually, fuck Twitter.

Here's your complete list of winners from last night.

Watch It: NHL Awards Ceremony Tomorrow Night

Ovechkin is in line to claim both MVP trophies for the second year in a row (Hart and Pearson), and Mike Green is up for the Norris Trophy. In the meantime the two of them are probably out getting accidentally rufied, stealing cop cars and Mike Tyson's bengal tiger, and marrying strippers. Just look at goofie Ovie in this interview. I bet he's still drunk from the night before: