Wizard-Nets Toilet Bowl Running Diary: 1st Quarter

I am so excited about the Wizards-Nets Toilet Bowl that I have decided to do a running diary. I decided to skip timestamps, so here are my thoughts for the game by quarter:

First Quarter

• Whaddya know, Jarvis Hayes starts for the Nets. I think if he started since game 1 this season, the Nets should be investigated for purposefully tanking. Zing! Thank you, I will literally be here all night.
• Young Sushi is starting, and has a heinous haircut. He told me his family is in town this weekend, so maybe he took notice from Ovie and had his Mom gave him that 'do.
• Play-by-play to start the game: miss, miss, layup, miss, miss - sounds about right
• Buck and Phil Chenier keep telling us how Andray Blatche has destroyed the Nets this year, wow, he and everyone else in the league.....Good thing no one is watching....
  
• Nice crisp passing allows for a nice shot over some good defense. Oh wait, that's the Spurs-Lakers game on my other TV.
• Blatche has 5 assists in under 9 minutes of play to help the Wiz lead 19-14. It also helps that we are playing the Nets, who have shot 5-18 to open the game.
• Cartier Martin hits a 3 right after coming in and now drives baseline for a reverse layup, and one! He literally does not appear to be sweating. Didn't he get the memo we need John Wall? Wiz up 27-18.
• Thanks to a buzzer beating tip-in by Mike Miller, Wiz lead 29-22 at the end of the first quarter. Nets are shooting 9-22, Wiz 13-25.

(Image courtesy of pointedmagazine.com and stats courtesy of espn.com and nba.com)