ZAUN Trade Completed: O's Receive 1B Prospect John Hughes From Tampa Bay
Rico Fantastic has locked himself in the bathroom and refuses to come out. It's OK, Rico. I'm sure the O's are about to trade Wieters for ZAUN.

ZAUN Replacement Screws Up Royally in Debut

Hitless in four at-bats? I guess even Baseball Jesus has his off days.

But before everyone hops on the "Trade ZAUN, and then trade Wieters for ZAUN" bandwagon, being built by inbred retards in a galaxy far far away, put his debut in perspective:

If your off day consisted of getting a standing ovation before your first at-bat, calling a great game on your own because the manager doesn't call pitches from the dugout, single-handedly attracting 15,000 extra fans to watch your team's baseball game, winning said baseball game, all the while looking like a serious stud, would you (or your fans for that matter) have anything to complain about?

I think not.

Although it'd be nice if he hit for at least one cycle tonight.

[Image via the Baltimore Sun]

Thoughts on Matt Wieters Call-Up

The cherry blossoms trees populating our fair Potomac waterfront each Spring, like a 40-something mother-of-three’s resolution to stave off Pringles and Chunky Monkey come January First, make the long-suffering District faithful über-confident one or two personnel additions, be it free-agent, heralded draft selection, or legendary coach, rectifies our dismal recent history. Yeah, Soccer Mom, and two-weeks at Fitness First makes love handles disappear and moustache bleach can make your unsightly facial features miraculously Bündchen-esque. This being the town, lest you forget, where we believed the Kwame Brown hype over a litany of excellent future pros, refused to storm the White House when the Skins employed, nay, started, Danny Wuerffel, and still came close to selling-out opening day at Camden Yards for a team whose number three through five starting pitcher roster featured Alfredo Simon, Mark Hendrickson, and Adam Eaton.

Allow me to pause to share, quite possibly, the world’s greatest cartoon known to mankind.

All being said, I don’t know what to think of Matt Wieters joining the Orioles this coming Friday. Suffice to say he can’t possibly be any worse than the ZAUN/Moeller combination (my apologies Rico). For starters, where does Trembley insert him in the batting order? The kid’s hitting at the three spot in Norfolk, but how can you rationalize breaking-up the ‘Balticore’ for a heralded but unproven call-up? Is this kid a future lightning-rod like Dustin Pedroia and Nick Markakis, or a possible flame-out like Jeff Francouer and Robinson Cano? For the life of me I don’t know where the smart-money lies with this one…one thing I do know is that my absence from the game on Friday hosting the Tigers bodes well for the kid’s future…

Wieters To Make Big League Debut Friday vs. Tigers

Perhaps the headline should read "ZAUN to Lose Job to Unproven Prospect Friday vs. Tigers", but that would be rude to the savior of Orioles baseball. And I don't mean ZAUN.

Wieters' call-up has been one of the more anticipated in recent memory. The most common phrase used to describe him is "Joe Mauer with power". Joe Mauer has 11 HRs in 24 games this year. So, yeah.

Normally, the expectations would be unfair and nearly impossible to live up to. But there's a silver lining to playing for a team with a small fan-base and zero playoff aspirations. This season is Wieters' chance to acclimate himself to big league pitching - both his own and that of his opponents. While it would encouraging to see him tear it up this year - and lord knows he has the talent to do so - it is not the end of the world if he doesn't. The Orioles are still a ways away from making noise, but the Balticore is in place.

During tonight's broadcast against the Jays, Gary Thorne had this to say:

"The way the Orioles are playing right now offensively, a couple more pieces in the puzzle, especially on the mound, and all of a sudden its a different ball club that's been seen here in more than a decade, and you've really got a chance to be very competitive."

That's it. Hope.

ZAUN Wins One for Baltimore: O's 4, Jays 1

In legendary fashion, Gregg ZAUN hit a tie-breaking game-winning RBI single in the 4th inning on Sunday, sending 800 Orioles' fans home happy on a rainy Memorial Day.

ZAUN reached base 3 times in all against his former team, inducing a walk and getting hit by a pitch to go along with his clutch 4th-ininning single. In the process, he managed to raise his BA from .210 to .215, putting what some might call a stranglehold on the starting catcher position. Sorry, Chad Moeller.

ZAUN declined to comment for this post, but made me promise to plug his website. Reminder to pump up the volume.

Additional thoughts on the game:

• The Jeremy Guthrie we've embraced as our "ace by default" for the last couple years finally showed up. It was only his 3rd Quality Start of the year. He had 19 last year. It'd be nice if he put together a few more of those, no?
• George Sherrill hasn't let up a run in 9 consecutive appearances. Don't worry, though - the trade deadline is two months away. Ample time for him to tank and decrease his value.
• Melvin Mora is a very mediocre defensive third baseman. He is also a very mediocre offensive third baseman. Ladies and gentlemen, your 2009 Baltimore Orioles!
• You get the feeling Markakis and Jones are cooling off a little. If I were Dave Trembley I'd swap their places in the lineup and see what it does for them. Markakis was great in the 2 spot last year, and Jones' gap power could pay huge dividends hitting behind him and Roberts.
• ZAUN.

Next up: Toronto (Romero) @ Baltimore (Undecided), 5/26, 7:05 PM