In the best use of a Nats message board we've ever seen, a Red Sox fan looking for good sports bars around Nationals Park to check out during a visit to D.C. for the Sox-Nats series this week was directed to a gay bar.Apparently the dope actually took the tip and showed up, where he "pounded his drink" and possibly more than that before leaving nervously.
Now don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with being gay, and lots of penguins and Penguins are gay, and they're funny little things the way they waddle and such. Don't know where this is going so I'm gonna stop right here.
Just want to point out that 1.) there are no black Red Sawx fans because Bostonians are racist bastards, 2.) Red Sawx fans are self-important ass-wads, 3.) drunken Red Sawx fans in the Fenway bleachers are hilarious and 4.) rooting against the Sawx is now just as appropriate as rooting against the Yankees once was.
The Sawx used to be the "people's team" that baseball fans rallied behind to take down the evil Yankees empire. Now, they are the evil empire. Watching Sawx Nation morph over the past five years was a bit like watching Annakin Skywalker become corrupted by his own power - at first you think there's hope, then WHAM! he slices up a gaggle of adorable toddlers. Point of no return, that.
Things will only get worse as these people continue to spread the globe like locusts, so let us revel in their awkward encounters at gay bars while we can. Besides, immature jabs are how I cope with my envy and my therapist says coping is healthy. Boston fans like it in the pooper. Go Nats!
[Image via The Boston Blogger]
[H/T to reader Goldie for the tip.]